I had my first real counseling session today. I was half an hour late, so we only had twenty minutes, but I have agreed to come back in the summer even though I don’t have classes. [I just realized I don’t know where I would park. A summer permit would cost another $98. Agh, I’ll have my sister drive me. She should get her license soon. She turned 18 today! I can teach her how to drive now. Also, she’s coming to school with me. She’ll major in Mechanical Engineering. She’s good with crafts and stuff, so it seems appropriate.]
It was more like a reintroduction, since this more permanent counselor has some info from the one who did the initial screening. She told me I’m depressed, and we can talk about antidepressants next week. She laughed and said I can google them in the next week. I don’t know how I feel about taking medication, especially if it is mind-altering.
She also said I scored in the 95th percentile for social anxiety on the screening forms I filled out (two standard deviations from the mean, my sister said), so she referred me to a social confidence class that meets once a week. I have another appointment tomorrow to find a group that will fit me.
Luckily this counselor laughs, so I feel comfortable talking to her. My eyes watered a couple of times, but I didn’t cry this time. I told her how my interest in Psychology developed, and that I’m INFP. I wonder if she accepts Meyers-Briggs. I need to ask her about ADHD.
Also, I have officially declared a minor in Psychology.
If my classes were taught this way, that would be awesome.
FUCT, I Need You Right Now And I Care Who Knows It
I find it very strange that people rely on each other for even the most basic of things. I feel uncomfortable when somebody helps me carry something or tries to help me with homework problem, no matter how hard of a time I’m having. Yet, I see people who are offended when no one offers them a helping hand.
I went to the eye doctor today for the first time in five years. My vision has gotten worse over the past year, and now I’m almost always seeing that shadowy halo around everything (Not sure if that’s just general blurred vision).
Firstly, I got to pick out new glasses to replace my scratched up ones. They are also red, but rectangular plastic instead of round metal. I couldn’t find any green or blue.
The eye doctor told me the nerve in my right eye looks “different” (what does that mean??), and he gave me a piece of paper to give to my doctor, so I can take more tests. Googling “anemia glaucoma” doesn’t really get me anything, but one website says pernicious anemia might share symptoms with glaucoma. I’ve been taking iron pills, and the doctor hasn’t called about my second blood test results from last Tuesday, but I hope I have pernicious anemia (B12 rather than Iron Deficiency) and that is the reason this is happening. Anemia is curable; glaucoma is not.
If anyone tells me I need to have eye surgery, I’m going to just move into a cave.
A fellow INFP. One that I would truly aspire to be like.
I tend to wallow in my spare time, but this is inspiring. I have a presentation (for math, really?) this quarter, and watching this shows you can get your point across without trying to yell or speak quickly. My “normal” way of talking is slow and around my head. In front of an audience, it’s like someone shrunk my voice and threw it in the far corner of the room.
His show (and others on PBS) always made me feel accepted and safe and that I was learning something, but it bothered me that I wasn’t allowed to watch Power Rangers like my cousins. No one ever talked about peer pressure or mental health in my family. They might seem irrelevant in a sheltered enough childhood, but they never are.
I think it’s safe to say I’m INFP.
Cognitive Process Level of Development (Preference, Skill and Frequency of Use)
extraverted Sensing (Se) (19.6) limited use
introverted Sensing (Si) (31.6) good use
extraverted Intuiting (Ne) (43.8) excellent use
introverted Intuiting (Ni) (15.1) unused
extraverted Thinking (Te) (26.1) average use
introverted Thinking (Ti) (27.4) average use
extraverted Feeling (Fe) (28.6) average use
introverted Feeling (Fi) (47) excellent use
Summary Analysis of Profile By focusing on the strongest configuration of cognitive processes, your pattern of responses most closely matches individuals of this type: INFP
Lead (Dominant) Process Introverted Feeling (Fi): Staying true to who you really are. Paying close attention to your personal identity, values and beliefs. Checking with your conscience. Choosing behavior congruent with what is important to you.
Support (Auxilliary) Process Extraverted Intuiting (Ne): Exploring the emerging patterns. Wondering about patterns of interaction across various situations. Checking what hypotheses and meanings fit best. Trusting what emerges as you shift a situation’s dynamics.
If these cognitive processes don’t fit well then consider these types: ENFP, or INTP
If these results are different from what you know of yourself, you might consider why your developmental pattern does not align with your expectation. You might also consider exploring this result as a possible better fit.
I did this once before, and the results are almost the same. Instead of ENFP or INTP, it said INTP or ESTJ (I think it was ESTJ). It’s very difficult to “cheat,” so I trust it.
Make sure you read the directions, the “questions” can be very confusing: http://www.keys2cognition.com/explore.htm
I visited Amoeba for the first time ever. Used CDs! It’s amazing there. I don’t feel self-conscious, because everyone’s off doing their own thing, with their faces buried in rows and rows of music. I want to go back, but it feels inconvenient to have to drive all the way to Hollywood. We only spent half an hour there.
I bought My Heart Will Always Be the B-Side to My Tongue, and I just finished watching everything on the DVD. Ten seconds in, and the tears were already flowing. I love these boys so much. I’ve watched this particular video so many times, but now I know where it’s from! Who knows how many people have touched these things, but I smell the pages anyway.
I’m so glad I’m able to enjoy things again. I belted out Take This to Your Grave on the way to school today. It was liberating and extremely satisfying.
I am having so much fun clapping along in my head. :)
Note: I found my icon on http://weheartit.com/entry/18878008, who found it from eatsleepdraw.com. I'm not sure if tumblr cropped off the crown in the corner.
